Touch is important. Taking your time is important. The 8 course gourmet dinner slowly savored is always more satisfying than a fast food burger. These are givens. You miss one thing however. The best relationships have a strong psychological component. When there is a spiritual connection between lovers, the physical aspects are dramatically enhanced. Touch, taking your time, and being creative are not enough in and of themselves. There is a joining of not just bodies, but minds and souls as well. When you can reach the point where you begin to feel what your partner’s feeling, you know you’re getting there.. These encounters are the basis for truly satisfying and long lasting relationships. It takes time and patience, but it’s worth the journey. You may have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince.

There’s lots of discussion these days about sexuality and how to accurately describe ourselves. One that has become popular is pansexual. I personally like this idea, because it indicates the individual is open to a relationship with any type of person of any type of sexual orientation. No relationship or individual is precluded. I think such individuals are the most open minded of all of us. (Note, I am not trying to belittle anyone with a more limited sexual orientation. This is merely a philosophical observation. People are entitled to seek out those to whom they’re attracted and who have an interest in the same kinds of activity that they do. We like what we like. That’s OK.) But even pansexuality does not go far enough. I believe It is the panromantics who have it right. They are the people who essentially are only aroused by those with whom they have developed an emotional and spiritual connection. Indeed it is emotional closeness which triggers, or strengthens, physical arousal. When the physical, emotional and spiritual are in synch, watch out. Doubly so when both partners are on the same page. Some panromantics limit their sexual activity to such individuals. For others it is the ideal they continue to seek while dining on a daily diet of fast food burgers while waiting. It is worth it to always keep searching.