When I used to work with inmates in prison, we would always tell them that they may not be able to choose the family they were born into, but they could choose the real family that they wanted in their life from those who cared for them and for whom they cared. Having said that, I think most of us would prefer to have our biological families be part of our lives. I have suffered the loss of my youngest daughter. It is not because I insist on being an asshole (though I am sure she can give you any number of examples from when she was younger). The biggest issue between us is the fact that I am transgender and she has drunk the MAGAT Kool-Aid. It was surprising and incredibly disappointing. When she was younger, she was the brightest and most open-minded of my three children. She lives in Denver and is well educated. But she thinks I am a bad influence on her three young children, deluded and sinful—surprising because she is not particularly religious.

In any case, I suppose the point of my comment is that this road goes both ways. Sometimes it is the children who are unreasonable and write off parents who would much prefer to be closer to them and who are more open minded and understanding. I wish it were not so .